WHAT TRUE FAMILY REALLY MEANS OR NOT!!!!!!

When a Homophobic Cousin Attacked a Woman’s Marriage, He Helped Her Understand What True “Family” Mean

Posted on October 6, 2014 by robw77

Once upon a time there were two cousins, Jessica and Robby. They grew up together in the warm and wet Mississippi back lands. They swam, they fished and Jessica loved and respected her cousin. He gave her the sense of understanding family and loyalty.

That sense of family and loyalty was upended completely recently when Robby recently ran to the American Family Association, an entity defined by the Southern Poverty Law Center as a “hate” organization, to get their help in humiliating and attacking Jessica’s marriage. Robby has never met Jessica’s husband.
Jessica and her husband, Nick, are legally married. Nick is a transgender male. A mutual friend introduced them a few years ago. Jessica states, “Nick has been my best friend since day one. We can always count on the other one during the hardest times in life. While he was in paramedic school, Nick felt my full encouragement through the whole way and I never gave up on his dream with him.  We stand by each other through every thing just as a husband and wife should. I know at the end of the day I can count on him and that’s what real romance looks like. Our love is the kind some people only dream about and I’m very lucky to be able to say I found that in this life with him.”
On the afternoon of September 23^rd, Jessica got a private message from her cousin Robby out of the blue. It said “Jessica, I want you to know that I love you both as a person and as my family. You hand I practically grew up together, and I don’t want you to think that I am angry with you. But I have to tell you that what you and Nick are doing is wrong, and I am going to be doing all that I can to challenge it. I realize this might upset you, but I have to do what is right as difficult as it is going to be.” Jessica had no idea what he meant about “challenging it”, but she was soon to find out.
That evening, Robby posted this to his Facebook wall: “Last week I learned of a same sex marriage that took place right here in the state of Mississippi. Two females, one of which is a family member of mine, applied for and was granted an official marriage license in Desoto county. One of the partners poses as a man and managed to obtain a driver’s license that legally identified her as a male. I would like to urge all Mississippians who are outraged to join me. This is a battle that has come to us and we cannot afford to lose traditional marriage”. Then he then gave the phone numbers of the attorney general, lieutenant governor and the governor.
Around midnight, Jessica received another private message from a woman she had never met. “You need to see this video,” the message said. The video was her cousin Robby on a show with the AFA’s Bryan Fisher. Bryan Fisher is infamous for homophobic statements that include the encouragement of the kidnapping of children from LGBT families. They were making public Jessica and Nick’s names, implying that they were criminals, that their marriage was a fraud scheme and stating out and out lies as fact. The video is here .
“The video makes it seem like we did all of this to pull one over on the state of Mississippi, and that’s nowhere close to the truth.” Jessica told me. “Mine is not an illegal marriage in any state, because it is not a same sex union at all. That is not legal in this state, and there is no “loop hole” for that to be possible. Nick actually transitioned from female to male, and had his name and gender legally changed complete with birth certificate, social security card, drivers license, and all medical licenses. After all of that was completed we were able to apply for our marriage license and got married, the same as any other opposite gender couple.” Bryan Fisher characterizes Jessica and Nick as two lesbians, one of which had a hormone shot, and then fraudulently had records changed.
Nick’s process to his correct gender started before 2010. He had undergone full psychiatric exams in preparation. In 2010 he started a permanent hormone therapy program and had physiological operations in support of his transition.
Nick works as a paramedic saving lives and he has been seen as a true hero in his community. The AFA’s intrusion into his private life, and their dishonest portrayal has now caused him issues at work. Jessica reports, “While he is out saving strangers lives, we have to worry about the safety of our family and his career. It takes teamwork from his fellow co-workers and since the videos and articles have come out, he has been treated like an outcast.” Many that Nick worked with had only known of him as male, his actual gender. Now feel they have license to judge.
Jessica reached out to the popular Twitter site Stop-Homophobia. “Help us,” she asked, attaching a link to the AFA video. She began hearing from many people who have showered love and support. Those messages helped her deal with her feelings of betrayal and crisis over what family was supposed to be about. “For me when I saw the video I felt it was one of the worst betrayals ever, to find out that someone made us out so horribly, and on top of it for it to come from a family member. The feelings we felt over this outrage, words can’t describe. We are being vilified for the same loving and commitment other married Mississippi couples share with each other. Our right to commit to each other for the rest of time is being portrayed as everything it’s not. The video want to portray us as deceivers who did all of this to pull one over on the state of Mississippi, and that’s nowhere close to the truth. The truth is our marriage is built out of the love we have for each other.”
“We are very grateful for the support and love that we have come across through this attempt to humiliate us,” Jessica states. “So much of our family have stepped up and let us know they are open minded and accepting and loving. The members of Nick’s family are powerful defenders of him as a man and a hero. Especially his dad, who has always been his biggest supporter. My family accepts Nick as the person for who he really is, especially my sister and most of them right here in Mississippi.”
This has given Jessica and Nick a new definition to, not the word “marriage”, but the word “family”. Blood cousin Robby is not family. The “American Family Association” is not an association of families; it is an association of those who want to attack families that do not look exactly like a set of limited parameters. Those who see his life saving work but who cannot see Nick as he is, are not family. It is the people who love, support and celebrate him who are the true family, and Jessica and Nick are blessed to have many who have such qualifications in their lives.
“Nick taught me what marriage is,” Jessica commented. “Now someone I grew up with has caused me to re-look at what I thought being family meant. It does not mean blood and telling falsehoods to meet an agenda. It means love and honesty. I stand corrected, and we are now a stronger family as a result.”
Sharing DNA is no big deal. A person’s ability to look deep, push past their own pre-conceived notions to better understand a family member they love, and then stand up for them, that ability brings the greatest value in life. Some will learn they have that ability within themselves and stand proud. Others will make videos.

Gay couples cheer U.S. Supreme Court move, make wedding, family plans

Monday, 06 October 2014 19:22

SALT LAKE CITY-- Marina Gomberg was in bed on Monday morning when she heard the news that the U.S. Supreme Court had effectively made gay marriage legal again in Utah and she immediately started dreaming that she and her wife could become mothers.
"We can actually start thinking about starting a family. We are going to be moms! It feels like a really big day, personally and for the rest of the state," said Gomberg.
The Supreme Court on Monday rejected appeals in gay marriage cases involving five states - Virginia, Oklahoma, Utah, Wisconsin and Indiana - that had prohibited gay marriage, leaving intact lower-court rulings striking down those bans.
For Gomberg, 30, an employee at the University of Utah, the move means that she and her wife can take the next step in their relationship.
Gomberg and Elenor Heyborne married in December of last year in Salt Lake City, among roughly 1,300 gay couples who wed after the state's gay marriage ban was initially lifted by a federal judge, before such marriages were later put on hold pending appeals.
As a result of the Supreme Court decision on Monday, the number of U.S. states permitting gay marriage would jump from 19 to 24, likely soon to be followed by six more states that are bound by the regional federal appeals court rulings that had struck down bans. That would leave another 20 states that prohibit same-sex marriage.
For some same-sex couples, the decision means the state where they live must recognize the marriage they had performed out of state.
Amy Sandler, 37, of Munster, Indiana, said Monday's announcement brings some peace of mind for her and her wife Niki Quasney, 38, who has stage-four overian cancer, and their two toddlers.
Sandler and Quasney were married in Massachusetts in August 2013, but now Indiana, where they live, will have to recognize the marriage.
"It makes us know that we have legal backing like any other married couple, whether it's recognizing our family, whether it's moving our state forward socially, whether it's walking into a hospital," Sandler said.
Although the Supreme Court did not make a definitive ruling on gay marriage, Sandler felt the justices had sent a strong message.
In Norman, Oklahoma, ordained minister Jessica Fisher said she had been waiting for this news and is poised to perform a wedding ceremony for a same-sex couple she knows as soon as they are ready.
"I'm not sure if they will file for a marriage license today or not. They were very surprised to hear the news today, but it's the ruling they have been waiting for," Fisher said. "They asked me to become ordained so I could officiate their marriage, if it happened."
Fisher said the couple was married in a civil ceremony this year in Eureka Springs, Arkansas, but has been unable to file the official paperwork and license in Oklahoma.
In Wisconsin a county clerk said he does not expect a flood of license filings, but those that come in will be issued.
"This ruling does not come with the fear that there will be another stay or appeal," said Dane County Clerk Scott McDonell in the county that includes Wisconsin's state capital of Madison.
"If couples come, we will treat them like any other couple," McDonell said.

ALEXANDER DICK'S OPINION ON SAME SEX COUPLES!!!!!

Hi, I would like to share this thought that I've been walking around with for a very long time.  It's about couples with the same sex.  This is not an "issue" at all.  People who don't agree with it, makes it an issue.  I mean WHY?  Why do you have to worry yourself about other people's life, with who they have been with, or with whom they have in their life.  While you're wasting your time on nonsense, we're living our lives and making the best out of it because you only live once.  So I think you should better do the same and stop over-reacting about GAY COUPLES and mind your own damn business; I really don't see the point.
The Givenchy, Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Versace and Dolce & Gabbana you're bragging around with is from a Gay/ homosexual man who has an incredible talent for fashion.  So please, keep your comments to yourselves.  They also have partners of the same sex, well not all of them, but the point is you're wearing clothes or brands of Homosexual men.  I know that some people may feel uncomfortable, especially religious people when they see couples of the same sex holding hands and kissing.  It's unusual right?  But that doesn't mean that you have to discriminate against us and act as if  we're not HUMAN BEINGS.  We live in the same world and we breathe in the same air.  Some people are trying to understand, but some never will.
Many couples are afraid to walk together on the street or they even have secret relationships.  I think it depends on the country.  Holland is very GAY friendly and approves marriage of the same sex, and Uganda is the complete opposite of that...You can't even wear pink, because they will burn you alive.  It's really a sad thing to see, how people treat their own fellowmen.  Again it doesn't solve anything.  It's bad publicity, you're giving your country a terrible image, so why behave the way you do?  What did you get out of it at the end of the day?  Nothing positive can come out of it.  You made your country and yourself  look bad and ridiculous.
 These are a few things that most of us fear and we hide our personal life from the world. I clearly understand that, its normal.  People say that the bible does not approve this action, that it's a sin.  But how could I believe in a book that has "not" been properly translated since the beginning of time?  It has been written over from hand to hand until now.  Why do we even exist?  Why are we in this world if we're against God's Law?

Tell me what is your opinion!!!!!

GRACIAS, XOXO *WINK EYE*
Always be yourself, don't let anyone change you!!!
ALEXANDER DICK/ MINELVA MADURO.

ALEXANDER DICK: OPINION ABOUT BEING GAY IN CURACAO VERSUS ST. MAARTEN.

I think that being GAY IN CURACAO, is harder than in ST. MAARTEN.  If you're gay and living in CURACAO, then you know exactly what I mean.  People will call you names.  If you're a gay guy behaving like a girl, "BEWARE".  It will get worse, you may get beaten by a group of homophobic dudes.

I've been to St. Maarten three (3) times, and its different from Curacao.  If I'm not wrong, the only thing I've noticed is that the people on St. Maarten, will give you looks or stare at you as if you were an EXTRATERRESTRIAL CREATURE they've never seen before.  Well, I feel great about it, knowing that I'm getting noticed; they're making me REMARKABLE.

In my mind, I still feel sad for other GAYS and LESBIANS here on St. Maarten, that doesn't have the support from their FAMILIES, or they don't have the courage to be who they really are, or they keep hiding in their own shadow as if it will remain an eternal secret.

I can assure you that hiding doesn't make anything better.  It goes from bad to worse, you cannot do anything like a normal person, because you're striving to not get noticed.  For me, it's impossible to not get noticed by other people.  People are all up in your business like "WENDY WILLIAMS", so it's impossible.

I personally never "CAME OUT OF THE CLOSET", in fact I was never in the CLOSET, I was well afraid, but then things started to be normal for me.  I got exposed to the GAY WORLD, when I took part in a pageant for GAY PEOPLE when I were only mere 15 years old.  I got 1st runner- up and MISS ELEGANCE, and that's when I got a lot of attention from people.

They have been asking on the streets if I was the guy that got 1st runner- up in the contest.  I simply replied with a "BIG FAT NO", you're wrong man, because at that moment, I didn't want my MOM to know cause I hadn't told her as yet.

Somehow she got a hold of a picture of me performing on stage, and I felt ashamed to see her looking with gazing eyes.  Everything went okay after she got the news, and I have plans on entering the pageant again and this time to win.

I think everyone deserves to live a happy healthy life, and everyone should have the same rights in order to have WORLD PEACE as they claim in pageants.  It's not our fault we're like this.....  It's not a decision that has been taken when our parents gave birth to us, WE ARE BORN THIS WAY, so be happy with yourselves; pick yourselves up and turn the world into a more TOLERABLE AND ACCEPTING PLACE.   DON'T FORGET WHAT I SAID!!!!  PUT A STOP TO HOMOPHOBIA NOW!!!!!!!!  GRACIAS!!!


ALEXANDER DICK : XOXO

ALEXANDER DICK: "COMING OUT STORY " PART 1

As a little boy, I grew up with my grandmother because my mother was not ready for me.  I was her unexpected child child, because she was not ready to have a child.  She was only 20 years old, she had no job, no money and she did not finish school.  That's why my granny had to take over and raise me "properly" on her own.  With properly I meant extremely strict and with a lot of manners.  I started feeling like a prince.

Growing up with highly exaggerated house rules and manners made me feel like I was not at home in my own home.  I could not express myself the way I wanted to.  When I was 9 years old my mother claimed that she was ready since her 16th birthday.  According to my mother, my grandmother was exaggerating the whole situation that she could not handle a child.  After two (2) weeks of fighting over who was going to stay with the child my mother won.  I went to live with my mother and her partner.  My mother was not strict at all.  She was a regular teenager/ young mom trying to have some fun, even though she had a child.

As the days passed by, I started to realize that her partner was the finest thing I had ever seen.  He was like an African-American supermodel or a highly paid pornstar.  He was tall and a really nice guy.  He was dark skinned, really nice shaped muscles and bright white teeth.  He was just a  desirable man, the solution to most of my worries.

Later on in puberty, I started to behave and act like a lady at school.  The students were calling me names constantly, it was a nightmare.  Being bullied at school made me realize that my grandmother was protecting me.  She was protecting me in such a way with her extreme set of house rules from getting noticed or even bullied.  I always say, "you can't hide the sun with one finger".  As the days kept passing I started to get more attracted to boys.  It didn't seem like I had a choice, I didn't have to choose between boys and girls.  I just happened to like guys, especially my mom's partner, because this guy sleeps and walks naked in the mid-night so I could see him every night.

Let's move on.  My mom loved to buy me boyish stuff and toys. I only used to play with them once and then I'd put them aside.  I was more interested in dolls and girly stuff that my mom prohibited me to play with, but every weekend  I used to go to my cousin's house and played dolls with her.  I would even borrow 2 or 3 dolls to play with secretly in my room when I reached home.  As I was growing up, I started watching girly tv series and pageants, as I started to get more and more attracted to boys.  When I was 15, I was in my lotus bloom.  I wanted to discover more about being GAY, and explore the world around me, that my family had hidden from me.  They were treating like a mutant or a person who had some wierd disease.

Do you know the popular song from Indina Menzel, "LET IT GO"?  Well I felt quite like that.  I was 15, I was this pretty young boy that wanted to know everything about having feelings for the same sex.  At first, I thought that this was wrong or I'd been cursed somehow, but then I realized that it's something inside of me that cannot be reversed or taken away.  It's a part of you that makes you who you really are.  Nothing can change you, and after that I started being fearless.  When I was 16 years old, I was so confident about myself that even my straight friends started to admire me, and the strong personality that I have.  Even though I was sweet and nice, I spoke my mind and did whatever I liked to.  You can break me down, you can throw me now, the harder out, the harder I come back around.

You can break my heart, but you can't scratch me.  I can take a 'hit', because I am an indestructible boomerang with this thought in my mind.  I opened and close many doors of people, I experience good and also very bad moments in my life.  Being GAY  IS A TOUGH THING, AND I'VE LEARNED HOW TO MANAGE IT.  I have a lot of friends, people who love me and admire me.  I have a wonderful boyfriend that supports me in everything, so why should I care when they're calling me names or talk shit behind my back?  I'm not wasting my voice and time on worthless people.

People were gossiping since the beginning of time so why should you care?  It's your life!  Acceptance is the only key to truly being free.  I know that this world is a nightmare for most of you out there, but all you have to do is BE STRONG!!!  With my 18 years of life, I can say I did a lot and confronted many obstacles, BUT I'M STILL A FEARLESS BITCH.!!  GRACIAS!


ALEXANDER DICK xoxo.

THE COMING OUT STORY OF A YOUNG BISEXUAL WOMAN PART: 2

The life that I'm iving is not easy, but I wake up every morning with a smile and give God thanks, for letting me live to see another day.  I'm in a relationship with both MALE and FEMALE, and it becomes hard at times to divide my heart in two (2).

My girlfriend lives on a different island, and my boyfriend on St. Maarten. I know there's a saying, "if you're not living on the same island or country, then it's not a relationship." My girlfriend and I have been going out for two (2) years now, and we have been through hell and back.

She loves my daughter as if she were her own.  My

boyfriend and I have the same amount of years together.  He has been through soo much with me as well.  My family isn't proud of me for being who Iam today.  Me being a young bisexual young lady is the life that I know and I'm very proud .  My girlfriend don't mind that I have a boyfriend, but on the other hand, my boyfriend don't like the fact that I'm dating a girl.  When entering a relationship with a guy, I always tell them that I date girls, and I'm proud that I do so.  Most guys would say no problem, and some would want you to give it up.  My relationships haven't been easy with both male and female, but I can say I'M A PROUD BISEXUAL, AND I'M HAPPY SHARING MY STORY WITH OUT'N'PROUD!!!!!!         

                                                    

 

                                                          

                                                                                                                                 

 

COMING OUT STORY OF A YOUNG BISEXUAL WOMAN: PART 1



 As a young girl at the age of 13 years old, I didn't know the meaning of anything.  I was sexually abused by my Aunt's boyfriend.  I said right then and there, I would never deal with men.  I picked up my first girlfriend in school, we were together for about 1 year and she made everything feel so different.  I was young and dumb as I started hooking up with a next girl I went to school with, and the first ended  our relationship.

Attending High School, I met my first boyfriend.  So I decided to give it a try; and I did.  We've been together for a while, then he started asking when are we going to have SEX.  I was making 15 at the time, so I gave into  his pressures.  We had sex at his parents house, and I thought everything were fine, until I realized his cousin were outside watching and video taping the whole time.  I was shocked and besides myself and gave up on MEN/BOYS.             
I returned to school 2 weeks later, and started changing the way I dressed, and by that i meant dressing fully like a BOY.  With me not being able to cope with whom I really am, I got into fights, and also starting fights.  My last fight was with a girl, and it didn't end well.                   

A few months after, I started dating a guy again, and we were the cutest couple you've ever seen.  Seven (7) months into the relationship, we started experiencing some problems.  Lies were been told here and there, I guess my friends or who I thought were my friends didn't like to see us together.  As you expected that relationship came to an end also. (I WAS YOUNG AND DUMB). 

Right after that, I met my daughter's father.  In the beginning it was all fun as expected, driving his cars, picking up girls, going to the beaches and skipping school.  We travelled to a different island and there my daughter were conceived at the tender age of 16 turning 17 years of age.  After she was born, the relationship between her father and myself had gotten abusive.
I ended it and continued with my life's journey.                                                                              

Now that I'm in my 20's,  I can now say, I met the most amazing girl ever and I'm inlove with her.  I don't know how long she would be around for, but I'm enjoying every moment I have with her, and my daughter.  Only one life to live and I'm living it.  I've learned from my past, its been rough and I will not let it dictate my future.  Its not worth it putting yourself down for anyone, and that is what i try to teach to my daughter.  I WOULD ALWAYS LOVE MY DAUGHTER FOR WHOM EVER SHE WANTS TO BE.
I'M PROUD TO SAY TODAY, THAT I'M A PROUD BISEXUAL WOMAN!!!!!.


I WOULD LIKE TO SAY A VERY HEART FELT THANK YOU TO THE YOUNG LADY
THAT TOLD ME HER STORY, AND LOOKING FORWARD FOR PART 2, CAN'T WAIT!!!    LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR YOU AND NOT FOR OTHERS!!!!!!
M.  MADURO